spanking with love for me is not possible at all.
hurting somebody why you love them?

i mean, what could that child have done that all the love in us would make us to spank them?
broken the world?
broken something else?
getting in danger situations?
what?

there could not be somuch love to spank an kid at all…

if the love makes that doing us… hell… how painfull more must be the hate?

no, there is no reason for spank out of love, but if we are seriously, we know, we spank because we have no other idea anymore.
an honestly, that is, because we parents missed by time something importand to teach our big loved kids. and that helpless feeling (could have by exident called love) than think that everything will be fixed if we just spank…

cooling down, explaining what will happen… dear kid, now i love you so much that i MUST spank you… gosh, that is the most funniest story i have heared in years..

dont think i never have spanked my son.
but
i was on the end of my nerves, i was helpless and frustrated… even i explained calmed down why i do or did…
we tend to talk it better than it is to feel better about, yeah, that would be the right answer i would think…

look up in africa… most of the native countries NEVER EVER would spank their kids, they let the kids explore the world and with love they direct the kids in the rght ways… they are not bader kids because nobody ever spanked them…

i would say that we adults need to learn to improve ourselfs when and why we say no… are we just in a mood to get our quietness or is an child realy doing something bad?

an kid climes up on an sensible tree...well… kids klimb on trees they love that… mother does not even tell him there would be an reason to be spanked, but if she would have being smart, she just would have asked what tree would be ok for her son to climb on…

parents can make their kids to lovely respectful nice persons without spanking. i know many familys where the kids never had even an little spank, but the parents had and taked ti enought to teach and show the kids the right way… if we spank, we do not take that time, like i did not taked that time.
and guess what.. my son, now 17… i speak with him about the time when i spanked him and i sayed sorry my son… i was not knowing better i just back than got easy overwelmet with lots of things… please forgive me…

he did ad i´m glad he did and we have the best relationship mother and son can have… not because he where spanked but because i sayed sorry for my mistake…

peace for everybody and lits of love to not spank

Hate to compare kids and pets but any good dog trainer will tell you “never hit your dog” so why would you hit your child?  My personal view on spanking is, it should only be done when you’re hot.  I whacked my daughter exactly once when she had just thrown a rock at another kid.  She never forgot it, it was directly connected to the offense.

I’ve always thought it a little perverted to spank a child long after the offense that demanded it was past.  I was once, only once, spanked by dad with his belt, an act which was preceded by “this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you”.  I knew right then and there that daddy was a liar. 

I don’t believe spanking is wrong, admittedly it doesn’t work on a lot of kids, but it’s the only thing some kids are truly fearful of. Now I’m not talking about beating a child, there is a difference between discipline and violence.My father and mother both spanked me, but not over trivial “why didn’t you clean up your room” stuff. And I never got a spanking I didn’t deserve. There was never a mark left on me, and honestly, it didn’t hurt all that bad, I was just terrified. There was a “ritual” of sorts. I was sent to my room for about 5 minutes to think about what I’d done, and those were some of the longest 5 minutes of my life. Sitting there on my bed wondering if it was going to be suspension or spanking. More often than not it was priveledge suspension. But when I was spanked, it was with love, not anger, and as scared and mad as I was and no matter how many times I felt I couldn’t wait to get as big as my father, I always knew that. I’d again be made to sit and think about what I’d done for a few. Then dad would always come back with tears in his eyes and explain why he did what he did. That’s how I knew it was out of love, it wasn’t what he wanted to do. Oh I didn’t get nearly the spankings as I had coming, but I have thanked my father for all those times he whipped me into line and I love him all the more for it, because he didn’t always do what was easy.Again there is a difference in violence and discipline. There is also a difference between being a parent and being your kids friend.I just want to be left to rear my child the way I see fit, without interference from the government or someone who thinks they know my situation better than I do.

Personally, I grew up to be an angry, confused, and very terrified person- and now a senior citizen- I’m still working at getting over it!

http://www.nospank.net/pt2009.htm

Niemac

Fear is a great motivator only your kids will hate you for life if you over do it and your dog will be a slinking cur, not good qualities in either case.  A good parent, animal trainer, any sort of person with power over others, needs respect not fear.  Fear will always breed contempt with people and with animals it will introduce a measure of unreliability. 

My little terrier has had to have her attitude adjusted on occasion but scolding her while putting her on her back is all that’s needed.  Momma dogs, even wolves, normally do not hurt the young ones.  I still say there’s a valid comparison.  I believe there is a natural inclination for both dogs and kids to please, maybe as teens they lose it temporarily, not sure. I worked with juvenile delinquents and street kids who require a firm hand but not, as some old fashioned teachers would tell you, a never smile attitude.

My students were very manageable because I did not lord it over them, which creates resentment.  There was not only respect there was a genuine affection that prevailed. Now that, I call, the best of both worlds.  Fact is, we have a very close relationship with both our children, now forty and older.

I didn’t fear my father so much as what I thought he might do. And I certainly don’t hate the man nor do I have ANY ill feelings toward him. I just think and have seen that certain children fall into line with just a cross look from an authority figure, while some respond to hardly anything. My friend’s kids are never corporally punished. They are sent to their room. In said room they have a TV, computer, telephone, video games, you name it. The kids are unruly and have no social graces nor do they have any self control. Everyone stopped hanging around or going anywhere with them because of this and they wonder why. But if you tell them the reason why, you’re some kind of monster. Do you honestly believe ALL children should fall into the same category where punitive actions are concerned? Tom, you even said you wallopped your daughter once, maybe only once, but she did deserve it, right? So as we see, sometimes push comes to shove, and don’t get me wrong I hope my son responds without spanking, but if he doesn’t, well...I’m prepared. As for the lady who appologized to her son for whoopin’ him one time, if their relationship was so precariously perched, there was more to the problem than one simple spanking, unless she beat him mercilessly (see violence vs. discipline above).

Since everyone is different, it really depends on the kids.

Some kids are just naturally good, others just really need to be beat a lot.

It doesn’t have to be a chore though.

Make a game out of it. Give ‘em a running start!

I’ve heard that if you hunt your kids, then you won’t have to take them hunting. 

or something like that.

I can’t wait till my boy is old enough to hunt. I’ll make him drag the deer out of the woods.

I was afraid of my parents. I don’t hate them. I just knew that if I screwed up I’d get the crap beaten out of me.

Odds are if you don’t hit your kids you are just going to buy them dirtbikes one day, and then they are going to be pricks their whole life.

Jason Bugg - 01 August 2008 02:58 PM

I was afraid of my parents. I don’t hate them. I just knew that if I screwed up I’d get the crap beaten out of me.

Odds are if you don’t hit your kids you are just going to buy them dirtbikes one day, and then they are going to be pricks their whole life.

I don’t know about odds.  Do you have kids or are you just repeating old wives tales? My wife and I were never beaten, never even hit and neither were our kids and voila monsieur, here we are enjoying our golden years and have two very talented and loving children close at hand, not living in Oregon.  Here in Hendersonville and West Asheville.  One graduated summa cum laude just last year, the other magna cum laude.  Of course they were both mature individuals when they finally got back to college but obviously they are not suffering from never having been beaten.

Oh yeah, I was a scary SOB when they were kids, scared everybody, even myself, but it never translated into the physical realm.  I think it’s a cultural thing.  My grandfathers were both very strict but also never struck their children so it goes back a couple of generations.  Not middle class educated people either, none of them, blue collar and farm stock.

I have eleven children, mostly from my days as lead singer of Van Halen.

I stand behind my assertion that if you buy a kid a dirtbike when they are young they turn into little sullen pricks when they grow older.

Guys, guys ... I think we’re forgetting the bigger picture here: What does Ron Paul think about spanking? That’s what we should be focusing on.

It is with humility that I admit to all of you that I did violence to both my son and a dog yesterday.

I’m curious about where you folks stand on this issue when it comes to breaking up a fight between your kung-fu-grip-equipped two year-old and your long-eared dog. I know how to squeeze peoples wrists to make them let go of something, but I was trained to do that to adults not toddlers. Prying fingers loose one by one did not seem like a good option with a snapping mouth full of big teeth in the vicinity. If I ever broke one of my son’s bones doing a wrist-release I would be one of those shambling drunken street creatures by the shelter. I felt that a chop to the back of my son’s knees to make him throw his arms out for balance was the best way to prevent him from getting bit.

Later that day I open-palm punched a neighboring dog in the canine-equivalent of the solar plexus when it was attacking my dog on our carport. We’ve already warned the other dogs owners once after an actual bite.

If you have more than one kid, or one kid and a dog, what you do when they are fighting in such a way that it is truly dangerous?

I realize many of you don’t have children but I still welcome your critiques. You were children once.

Best all around method is ice water, shocking but harmless. It will cure anything, even an erection.

The logistics of keeping the ice water handy defy me.