First of all, let me just say this is written with as much sincerity as I can possibly convey on the internet, whether you choose to believe my sincerity or not is entirely up to you.
First of all let me say that you and I are a lot alike. We’re both fiery braggarts who love shooting our e-mouths off on the internet. It’s fun, and something about your posting style says that much like myself, you enjoy your own fair share of lulz when you are surfing the tubes.
I understand this. I mean, who doesn’t like seeing a guy take a nuchaku shot to the groin and then fall onto a skateboard, ruining a charity event that could save a person’s life? I know that I do. But, something happened to me a little while ago and I wanted to share it with you.
I realized that it consumed me for a while.
I started posting here, and really tried to shoot my mouth off. I wanted people to know my name, face and opinions. I wanted people to realize that I was a funny guy, and a decent guy. But somewhere along the way, I went from being a guy that argued the points that he cared about and peppered them with crappy comments to the guy that just made crappy comments in some desperate attempt to garner lulz from the internet masses (or what they called in your generation, the peanut gallery*). Because of this, my internet “persona” became that of a bitter, angry guy with bits of self loathing thrown in for good measure because I didn’t understand why I wasn’t having fun doing it anymore.
I could ramble on about an awakening of sorts, or new leaves to turn over, but I don’t think it would matter- the point is that one day I got sick of being the mean spirited hate machine that I was and now I’m trying to be something else- granted, there have been times, and probably there will be brief moments where in the future I slip back into that mess, but for the most part, I come here to be happy. I come here to crack jokes, and I come here to debate.
I don’t speak for the forums as a whole or for the Xpress or even for Shanafelt, but I believe you can do the same thing. I believe that you can come here and engage in conversations, debate and even some good ol’ fashioned chicanery (isn’t that what they called it in ‘Nam?) if you just let go of the anger. Nobody here hates you. In fact, I’m sure you’re an interesting guy who’s led a life that I’d like to hear about sometime. I’m willing to bet that if you tried, much like I am trying to do, drop the internet troll routine, you can be a champion of your political causes and opinions on the Mountain Xpress boards. You might even learn to board hard one day.
It’s not easy, but you probably know that nothing in life is. You’ve been around the proverbial track a few times, and your experiences could probably give even the most sworn of your e-enemies around here a bit of perspective. I’m just saying that you should share it.
Plus, on the practical side, how annoying is it to have to constantly re-register an account? I hate it.
So next time you decide to sneak in, or if Steve doesn’t ban you this time. I would like to challenge you: let’s work on bridging the gap. Let’s both try to make this a light, happy place where each of us can learn something and have a few laughs. It can be done. I’m interested in doing this, are you?
I think deep down inside of that cold and hateful internet persona there is a big ol’ white haired, David Crosby looking dude who loves TM, Jimmy Buffett** and a tofu burrito at Mamacita’s just like the rest of us***, so why not show him to all of us instead of the usual gay jokes and “Obama is the messiah cracks”? We already have one Chad Nesbitt, don’t be like that guy.
So to reiterate, my challenge is for both of us to come here and to have fun. To talk about the news and to debate it. Even if it gets a bit heated, at the end of the day, there’s not a person who posts here that I wouldn’t have lunch with.
From what has been mentioned on the internet about you (granted, it is the internet so forgive me if I’m wrong) you seem like a pretty spiritual guy who is probably laid back at home. I say channel that. Let’s start from there, and then move forward. Let’s have a burrito sometime. You can have a beer, but I don’t want to drink (I’ll probably have to drive and you know how those cops are). We can laugh about socialism, magazine subscriptions and you can even tell me what Stuart**** is really like- the choice is yours.
I doubt you’ll reply, but I’m interested to see your response if you choose to.
Have a happy fourth, and throw a soy burger on the grill for me*****!
Jason “mister waffles” B.
*apparently in the old days, people went to museums and looked at peanuts. The peanuts, having mouths (this was, of course, long before we bred the mouths out of the peanut crops-Yay Science!) would make fun of the museum goers. I imagine they sounded like Taylor Dane.
** I don’t like Jimmy Buffet, but to each his own. I like Captain Beefhart, and a lot of people can’t listen to the guy.
*** I’m more of a fan of the chipotle chicken burrito (on whole wheat- gotta keep my rockin’ swimmer’s bod)
**** Stuart of Satsang fame, of course.
***** I don’t like soy burgers, but in the spirit of this internet-inspired Glasnost, I thought I’d try one just for the sake of making peace with you. They aren’t bad. I put A1 sauce on it, does that count as meat?
