My dog has spent much of the last six months slowly ruining the carpet in my apartment, virtually guaranteeing that I’ll never see my deposit again. It got me thinking about other people and their pets, and how my turmoil is probably petty when compared to the high-drama tales some of you have to tell.

So, let’s hear some tales about how your pets have ruined, wrecked and otherwise destroyed your lives, all the while being oh-so-cute in the process.

My wife and I have a cat who was given to us by a friend. As a kitten, she was found in a barn, malnourished and a little wild. She’s turned out to be a great cat, but the first year was more than a little trying to our nerves.

My parents have a little wiener dog, and we babysat it for them once. While the cat is used to my dog, something about my parent’s dog really upset her. And she decided to communicate her feelings to me one night. With her urine. On my hand, while I was sleeping.

It turns out that cats can fly, if you help them out a little.

Still, to this day, I snap awake if I so much as feel her brush against me while I’m sleeping.

I had a Jack Russel Terrier that raped and killed a nine year old child two doors down. It was sad. I still go to prison to walk it, though.

My dog crapped on a phto of Jason Bugg. Oh wait, that’s not such a bad thing. -:)

That’s Bill Clinton. Once again, you lose.

Whilst teething, my rottie “encouraged” me to go wireless whether I wanted to or not...by ripping the modem out of the computer and chewing the cords off.  (She’s since been trained very reliably to not go near cords, not even to chase a runaway toy.)

Jason, I had to use Bill’s photo because yours had already been crapped on. -:)

This morning my dog peed on a Hillary For President campaign sign. Oh wait, that’s not such a bad thing.

My cat wrote the screenplay for White Chicks.

shadmarsh - 02 March 2008 11:58 PM

My cat wrote the screenplay for White Chicks.

What a great argument in favor of humane euthanasia.

one of my dogs chewed the cap off a supersize bottle of advil and ate about 320+ pills.  supposedly the ibuprofen in just a couple advil can kill a dog.  they pumped his stomach at the vet and kept an IV in him for a few days & he ended up being fine.  my other dog ate a pair of my roommate’s tights and they got tangled in his intestines and he had 25 stitches where they cut him open to get them out.  they were crazy puppies.

My dog got a tumor on her neck and had to be put to sleep.

I had my dog for a while before she randomly decided one day to take every shoe I own out of my closet and chew on each one. She ate a couple pairs almost entirely, and just left chew marks in the rest of them. They weren’t even leather!

I walked into the living room to see her standing there in a sea of shoes wagging her tail and with her tongue hanging out. After a few seconds of awkward silence...she went running for the door.

She had never done it before, and hasn’t done it since....?

my dog (one of my boston terriers) pissed in the ear (literally, seriously) of a guy who wasn’t the nicest person anywayz ... so, in a way, it’s the best thing she did ... he wasn’t too happy about it ... but we still laugh about it at home! it’s a favorite family legend!