pfff - 09 October 2009 02:21 PM

...The example i gave earlier was her running across the street, even though she knows better…i mean, she could have been killed…

I solved this one by running over a grey dog on a foggy night about a year ago. I don’t recommend this, but it did work. My son hangs on tight in the parking lot and when he doesn’t, or won’t:

“Remember that time I hit the doggie with the truck?”

“Yeah?”

“Hold my hand please.”

“Okay.”

Maybe you could run over pumpkins or something in the driveway?

willc - 09 October 2009 02:49 PM

If it is attention she wants, give her attention. But be creative and proactive about it being a positive thing. If she gets enough positive attention, she won’t seek out the negative attention.

I’ve found one of the best things for ornery kids is the tactic of distraction. If one of mine starts getting whiny or disobedient, I try to be preemptive and redirect his attention to any one of the ongoing lists of things I have in my head. For example, “Hey want to see how long a piece of bread will float in a bowl of water?” Or, “Hey want to learn a magic trick?”

You gotta keep them occupied and keep their attention on things that are positive, or at least not negative.

good advise, for sure.  but the issue is that she thinks running off is a game, and when she’s in play mode, common sense goes by-bye. i have to chase her, because she does shit like run across the street, but then she just thinks i’m playing along. i grabbed her quite firmly and explained to her as best i could that that was NOT okay, but she’s 2, you know? I dont think she gets it.

maybe i’ll try the pumpkin under the car wheel. But really, it’s more about how do you deal with expressing your dominance in a situation like this where she is basically used to being in charge? it’s not just her running off when we’re near a busy intersection. it’s the fact she has NO consequences for her actions.

Honestly, if she was my kid, i would discipline her much stronger, but her Mom is sorta like the most hands-off parent i’ve EVER seen, so there is no reference for her for discipline. she would just think i was being mean. i love watching her, and i’ve had conversation with the mom about how hard it is getting for me when she isnt disciplined in ANY way (seriously, and its getting worse), but mom has her own childhood discipline issues she’s reacting against and gets all defensive when i critique her parenting (or lackthereof).

Other than not watching the kid any more, i’m not sure what to do.

pfff,
You babysit? Why didn’t I know this?

We live on a cul-de-sac with little traffic and my kids ran back and forth across the street without looking, despite years of yelling and punishments on my part. What finally, kind of, worked, was my son almost getting hit by my neighbor’s father, who then got out of the car, sat the boy down on the side of the road and scared him straight. Though i don’t recommend letting a kid almost get hit. But instilling some fear in these situations is OK, i think.

I also seem to drive a rodent magnet car. I’ve literally had kamikaze squirrels throw themselves under my tires. When I lived out West, prairie dogs would do the same. So the kids have seen some car-induced rodent death. Not an ideal teaching moment, but memorable.

I played in the road when I was a kid, and a neighbor spanked me. He then told my parents what he did and why and they spanked me. I got spanked twice for something. That’s some shit right there.

if i’ve never seen a better reason to not spank your kids, knowing they’ll turn out like jason if you do is a great one.

I hate you pfff…stop not ignoring me.  But your too true about Bugg…I was a nurse in psyche hospitals and jails…all of the sociopaths I knew were spanked like Bugg.  Bugg is a sociopath because he got spanked.  Now I know why Bugg is a sociopath…he was spanked.

Sociopath:

Bugg

See this thread why Bugg is a sociopath: http://www.mountainx.com/forums/viewthread/2331/P15/

I’m confused by this thread.

It was part of a role-playing experiment we briefly engaged in while you were briefly engaged elsewhere.

I once did some role playing. Away from the internet, of course.

Edgy Mama - 10 October 2009 11:48 AM

pfff,
You babysit?

yes.

Why didn’t I know this?

i dont know.
you didnt ask?

you assume i eat puppies?

I always heard that you people don’t eat the kitty.

racist.

Anti vagite

any response worth posting wouldnt be appropriate for the thread. but lets just say it might include the opposite of the two words above.

Pro-peniphile?